The Hardest Part

What’s been the hardest part, for me, about working from home?

You might think I’d say something like missing my friends, feeling lonely, feeling less engaged in meetings, feeling distant from my company, etc., etc., etc. And while those may be valid obstacles (which I like to think I’ve overcome), they haven’t been the hardest. For me, the hardest part has been taking a stand.

When I started working from home, I went all in. I wanted to do it right. Partially because I wanted it to work for myself. And partially because I had staff accumulating across the country that were counting on it to work. This caused me to place extra burden on myself to really represent. Some people’s jobs were depending on it!

This forced me into some awkward positions that can still be hard to deal with to this day. I’ve talked before about how I’m not coming in for your meeting… But sometimes that stance is really unpopular – especially with executive leadership. I even had one executive state said if you had any meetings with X-level leaders or above, you HAD to come in.

This really bothered me. What if my staff in other states had been asked to participate in these meetings? What if they were trying to move up the ladder? Would they be held back because of geography? Would it reflect negatively on them that they couldn’t attend in person because of distance? I certainly didn’t want that to happen to my people, let alone me. I felt like I needed to be overly diligent about fighting for at-home rights to protect us all.

In the short term, that was extremely hard. There’s nothing like purposefully disobeying your leadership to make a name for yourself. A not so good name. And that’s why this was the hardest part. For every meeting, I had to judge how much it would hurt me in the short term and what “trouble” I would be in for my mutiny.

I mostly stood firm, and stayed at home. I’d get called out in meetings about it. I’d get lectured. I’d get a black-eye or black-balled. Yet, I still did it. Some leaders would stop putting remote options on meetings all together trying to force the in-person transaction to take place. And for some of those, I’d ask someone else that I knew at the meeting to call me from the meeting. Yeah… that pissed some people off. And on the few occasions where I felt I had to go in or might be on the receiving end of a pink slip, it was rarely ever worth it. Nothing was so special about meeting in-person that it couldn’t have been done remotely.

I probably still have a bad reputation with some folks that have yet to get on the at-home boat. I know I ruffled their feathers. But that was a risk I was willing to take for something I believed in. Now, four years later, I believe all of those fights paid off. I believe I helped provoke a movement.

No one wants to be the black sheep. And that is why knowingly putting myself in that position was the hardest part about working from home. I risked my job for an ideal I was passionate about. Thankfully, it worked in my favor. I learned a lot about myself through that engagement:

• I am a strong person. Knocking me down doesn’t knock me out.
• I have conviction. If I truly believe in something, I will fight for it.
• I am an advocate. Advocates don’t always do what is popular. They do what is right.
• I have a lot of courage. It would have been easier to fold, but with great risk can come great reward.
• I am a leader. I work for my team, and in the trenches with them. I don’t just “manage people”.

Most of my battle scars have healed. And the result is a cult-like following of people that want to learn more about how to work at home successfully and the proliferation of the at-home program. The pain and fear resulted in ever-reaching positive outcomes. I’d say it was a good gamble.

It's all fun and games

I recently had a coworker contact me and ask what types of icebreaker games they could play at their virtual all-team meeting. Good question! So, here are a few based on your level of tools and ability to plan ahead:

Picture Pages

This is probably my personal favorite. You can make this as simple or as sophisticated as you’d like. The basic premise is to collect photos from the meeting attendees in advance without sharing to the broader audience, then combine them and present them in the meeting as a guessing game. You could do it for fun, or create a real survey-style sheet and collect the entries to pick a winner based on the most matches.

You can go simple, such as everyone send in a picture of your shoes (while on), and have people try to guess the person by their shoes alone. Or likewise with a deck photo, car photo, half of a selfie, back of their head photo, etc.

The pictures don’t have to be real! You could have people send in their favorite 80’s cartoon, superhero, video game character, board game, and so on. It’s more about capturing the personality of the individual in a manner that would provide insight into their character and not be the same across the board.

You can be as fun and creative with the subject matter as you’d like. Even better, if you have a theme to your meeting, pick a photo subject that corresponds.

As for me, I kicked it up a notch! I created a template that is a combination of many of these things and had folks find images for all of them. This allowed people to illustrate more of their personality. But, more importantly, it gave us an artifact we would hold on to and share internally so that it could be referenced later for new people or people that you didn’t work with as frequently. We refer to it as a “virtual desk”, similar to things you might learn about each other if you actually had a desk to approach for a visit. Below is mine. Isn’t it easy to get to know me better from this in quick order? And aren’t I awesome?!? ;-)

Two Truths and a Lie

Classic game of individuals supplying two facts about themselves that others may not be aware of, plus one lie. The goal is to guess which statement is the lie. When people use more obscure facts about themselves, the game becomes far more tricky, and fun!

You can wing this with no advance prep and ask people to make these statements live in your meeting, or type them into some web share (such as Lync, Webex, etc.) on the fly, and then just have others guess. Or these can be collected and collated in advance, and again a score sheet could be used to capture guesses on which item is the lie.

Tip: Having the items written, in advance or via the web share, makes it easier for people to recall all three statements and then review for which they believe to be the lie.

Buddy System

Prior to your meeting, the organizer should pair up all participants with another participant. This can be completely random, but if you’re me to go out of your way to assign people that don’t know each other or typically work together.

The assignment is easy: The pair gets on the phone and chats prior to the meeting to get to know each other, specifically some things about each other personally and their current work.

During the meeting, each person will introduce their partner instead of them introducing themselves. It’s a creative way to do intros while establishing some additional personal connections.

Story Time

If you ever went to camp as a kid, you likely played this game. Someone starts a story, then the next person adds on, and so on as the story goes. The last person brings it to a “logical” conclusion.

You can do this verbally. However, it’s even more fun to see the end product, and maybe even save it for future reference! Using web-share tools, and sharing a whiteboard or even a word processing doc, have someone start by typing the first few words. Then name someone to go next and take over control to continue typing. Some tools will make this very easy with annotation support.

Try putting a limit on it, such as writing only three or five words, before passing the story on to the next person. As the facilitator, you can start the story using words related to your theme or topic to relate it back to your meeting if desired.

Would You Rather…

Put together a slide or two in advance asking people if they would rather do X or Y. In your meeting, display this page and ask people to put a mark on their vote. You can do this with a word processing doc and just collect X’s or names. However, I prefer this in a tool with annotation ability, especially those with pointer arrows that include people’s names. It’s prettier and more fun for the user, usually easier to allow people to edit all at once, and also easier to reset.

You can set the X and Y parts of the game to match the theme of your meeting, or just silly concepts to break the ice. For instance, would you rather:

·         Be invisible or read minds? (Me: Read minds)

·         Eat nothing but sweets or nothing but savory? (Me: Sweets)

·         Give up TV/Internet or give up books? (Me: Books)

·         Swim with dolphins or ride an elephant? (Me: Dolphin)

·         Hike or swim? (Me: Hike)

·         Take a European vacation or Caribbean vacation? (Me: Europe)

·         Have more time or more money? (Me: ummmm…. Time?)

·         Talk like Yoda or breathe like Darth Vader? (Me: Talk like Yoda I will)

Tic-Tac-Toe

Draw up some tic-tac-toe boards. (You know – those giant hashtag looking things?) Assign a pair to play and let them go. You can make the boards in advance, or do them on the fly in your meeting. You can use tools like paint or word processing, but again I prefer web share tools with annotation abilities. It’s just easier for multiple people to engage at once, and tends to have more flexibility. You can keep track of winners and turn it into a bracketed tournament if you’d like. It’s simple, it’s easy, and it gets people engaged in the presentation medium. (And tic-tac-toe smack-talk can be a brutal and fun side conversation taking place!)

Pictionary

You’ve all played Pictionary, right? Pick a word, draw a picture of that word, and see if your team can guess the word you picked. Same deal, only virtual and using the tools to your advantage. Divide your meeting into two teams. The meeting host supplies the word to ONE PERSON on one of the teams, and gives them sixty seconds to draw. The others on the team are guessing out loud. The drawing works best with a nice annotation feature, but paint or other similar tools will also work in your web share. If the team gets it, they get a point. If they don’t, the other team can guess and steal that point. Rotate to the other team. Then rotate to the next player on the first team. And so on. First team to X wins.

If that feels like too much work, just share your whiteboard and have people draw. Pick out a theme and have them create a collective scene, building off each other. Maybe a summer’s day, a picnic, a snowy day, the zoo – it’s all in the engagement and banter.

Hangman

Is that name even still politically correct?? I’m using it anyway…

The host gets most of the work on this one, but it doesn’t require much-if-any advanced prep. Standard hangman rules: Draw the empty gallows, and draw the word or phrase as a serious of blank lines (“Wheel of Fortune” style). Take turns guessing letters. When the letters are correct, fill in your blank lines. When they aren’t, draw more body parts on your hanging dude. It’s up to you how elaborate you make your person. Decide how you want to declare a winner – it could be just for fun, or you could make teams like Pictionary with a steal option (after the dude is dead).

You can make the words and phrases related to your topic, or something silly. The best part is that everyone will get to see your awful computer drawing skills!

Quick Questions

Think of a silly question to ask the participants in your group. Have them share aloud or in writing through your web share. This is the simplest way out, but can be just as fun! Some ideas:

·         If you had a theme song play every time you entered the room/a meeting, what would it be? (Mine is the “Night Court” theme song… Inside joke!)

·         What should I never ask you about? (Don’t ask me about Apple/”i” anything. I’m a Windows and Android gal!)

·         What was the last concert you attended? Or what is the next one on your list? (I’ll be at Alice Cooper this weekend!! We’re not worthy!!)

·         If today were like High School, what superlative would apply to you? Most likely to succeed? Best dressed? Class clown? (I’ll go with cutest couple for me. My hubby is my prince. Awwwhhh…)

The bottom-line is that there tons of games you can play with remote teams depending on your goals and time available. The most important thing is to try. There are creative ways to turn almost anything into a virtual game if you just give it some thought. See how much you just learned about me? 

Home Improvement

There are very few things about working at home that I would consider negatives. However, when an item makes that list, it REALLY makes the list! Large home improvement projects… cue the Tim Allen grunt!

I’ve had a large, thankfully outdoor, project underway for a few months. In that time, I’ve had great experiences, annoying experiences, and downright awful experiences. I can’t even imagine if I had a project of the same caliber going on inside my home while trying to work!

The Good: I had one contractor that would text me any time he had a question and ask me to pop out when I could. He respected my time. And he respected that barging in would set off a ripple of annoyances.

The Annoying: There are always people here and there is constant noise. It’s a distraction. It breaks concentration. It even made me feel like a fish in a glass bowl, with the outsiders looking in. I felt bad taking a lunch break and eating while they were just outside the window working. And I certainly didn’t want to work out in front of them! Plus, those moments that require quiet thought for concentration were few and far between.

The Bad: Oh, the bad… I had another contractor that asked to use the restroom his first day, as he had been ‘sick’ lately. I allowed it since I felt bad, and frankly felt I need to be nice to the people working on my project to ensure it got done. Then it happened the next day. And the next. And every day for over a month. And these were not friendly visits – my poor restroom, which is right by my office, was taking a beating. So was my nose! Worse yet, he’d ring the doorbell each time regardless of our conversations. This was an immediate interruption to everything. I would have to stop what I was doing, as well as listen to the doorbell ring and my dogs go crazy. (I have come to now hate my doorbell and asked my hubby to change the chime!) This same crew would knock on the window or door each time they had a question, again ticking off my dogs. And these are only a few of the irritations!

I felt like many of the workers thought I was just sitting around in the house somewhere watching TV, doing nothing, and would always jump any time they rang. Obviously the very opposite was true, as every interruption was truly stopping me from doing the work that was paying for them to do their work and get paid. If only they understood that leaving me alone was the key to their very survival!

Oh – And what would you chuckleheads do if I DIDN’T work from home?

I learned a lot from this experience. I learned that you should feel empowered to say “No” and not feel bad. I learned that you should set boundaries without feeling that you are mean. I learned that you shouldn’t assume people understand what “working at home” really means. I learned that if you don’t speak up, you invite trouble.

How can you survive if you find yourself at home during a large project? Below are a few tips:

• Talk to your crew and set boundaries early. Let them know not just that you work at home, but what that means. Many people don’t understand what you do and therefore don’t understand the inconvenience. Boundaries may include times to start/stop work, if and how they should enter your home, how they should contact you if there is a question, etc. 
• If there is a special circumstance, such as a very important call or meeting, where interruption would be very bad, let them know in advance and ask that they don’t make a ruckus at that time.
• Let your coworkers know that you are having work done if you believe the noise may come through on audio.
• Ask your contractors up front about how they handle “conveniences”, such as whether they will have a port-a-potty on site or where they will pull power from. If they don’t have a plan, insist that they make one, or you will have plenty of company.
•  Designate a time where you will check in with the crew on any questions, such as your lunch break. This will minimize the ad hoc requests and allow you to conduct routine progress checks.
• Consider alternative work locations. For the time the work is being performed, you may want to work from the office, a friend’s house, or a local coffee shop where your interruptions and noise levels will be less.

Working from home during a project has its advantages. You can keep an eye on the progress, sign for the legal things, and ensure your property is respected in every way necessary. I’m glad I was here. But I’m more proud that I didn’t kill anyone and didn’t lose my job during the craziness, and lived to help others avoid it in the future.

Working While Sick

You've heard it dozens of times before... Your employer and coworkers say that if you are sick, you should stay home. They don't want your funk! They don't want to be grossed out by seeing or hearing what you are dealing with, and they certainly don't want to catch it, so they want you as far away as possible.

Why do you still go to work when you're in these rough conditions? You need that paycheck! You also don't want to burn through your paid time off (PTO) being sick because you want those days for vacation. And you may have meetings and deadlines that you'd miss and set forth a chain reaction that would take days and weeks to recover from. Doesn't that make you feel important?

Despite all of your valid reasons, your office mates are still right. You shouldn't be in the office. And this is yet another reason that working from home is the cure for what ails you.

When you work from home, no one is there to catch your germs. No one has to listen to the sounds you make (coughing, sneezing, blowing your nose, or worse...) You are containing your germs to you!

There are creature comforts of working from home as well. If you need to sleep in a little longer, no one will notice if you didn't get dressed, fix your hair, put on makeup, or skip your morning workout. If you are having a fever or cold chills, you are able to adjust the thermostat appropriately and dress to match, including sporting that awesome Snuggie you try to deny you have. If you need to take medication throughout the day, you aren't raising any eyebrows. And you truly cannot articulate the value of having your own, private restroom. Even your lunch time becomes more valuable as you can catch a quick nap, run to the doctor, refill a prescription, fix a bowl of soup, or otherwise help yourself get well.

Here's the best part: You're able to do all of this AND work. BOOM!

All of this assumes that you have some cognitive ability to add value, of course. There are some illnesses that you can work through, and some you shouldn't. Sometimes 50% of you at work is better than 0%, but in other cases you should just focus on a complete mend so that you can come back to work strong sooner. Check out my prior blog about allowing yourself to actually call in sick.

In a time where HR measures corporate wellness by the number of "unhealthy days", companies are trying to maximize productivity, and employees are using their vacation time to actually take vacation, being able to NOT take a sick day has increasing value. And that drives up the already valuable nature of working at home.

Work like Gidget

In January, I wrote about finding your reason to work at home. At the time, my reason largely revolved around Gidget, our doxy, who was struggling with old age and health problems, and how working from home allowed me to give her more years and more support in that time. Sadly, our little Gidget went to puppy heaven this past weekend. Our hearts are truly broken and there is an emptiness in my work from home right now.

But, I want to remember the good times. And those good times can help us all work at home a little better. So, let's reminisce about the Futz for a bit...

Gidget was a miniature dachshund, but there was nothing small about her attitude. She acted like a big dog and had no fear. She'd take on any opponent without hesitation because she knew she was a bad @$$. She once took on a Great Dane for picking on her doxy sister, and no one was coming close to mommy without her permission.

Gidget was playful. She LOVED her tennis ball. We had to build barriers under the couch to block the balls from getting stuck. She would play all day and night, and even sleep with her ball when we let her. She knew that life was short and she should have a ball, literally, while she was here. Gidget was also a big ham. She knew how to have a good time, laugh, and make others laugh. She was sneaky, and silly, and a bundle of crazy that eventually earned her the nickname "Futz".

Gidget loved her family. She protected them and wanted to be with them all the time. We would practically step on her because she was always getting underfoot in her stealth-mode. She used to climb up on the back of the couch and sit on my shoulder, both to watch and protect me from whatever, and to snuggle right into my neck. And she never grew out of being poppy's little baby.

Despite the best training, Gidget was always a yapper. Her bark could break glass and ring in your head until it ached. Any noise would set her off. Or her imagination. We'd beg her to be quiet, but she demanded to be heard. I miss that noise right now...

I could go on and on about the memories and personality of Gidget. She was one-of-a-kind. But I'll stop with one more: She was so thankful that mommy worked at home. She would have struggled and left us much sooner if I had not. And, even in her sickest days, she would still let me know how much it meant to her that I was here. Whether that was a pathetic kiss, a request to be held, begging for treats, or just that look in her eyes... She always said thank you and I love you. And I always said it back.

Work at home puts many challenges before us. Just remember to work, and live, like Gidget. Don't...

• Be afraid to live big
• Let the big dogs in the office push you around 
• Work so much that you don't have fun
• Neglect your family
• Sit in silence; speak up, often, and boldly
• Forget to say Thank You and I Love You
• Lose your 'why' (you work from home)
• Ever take your work from home status for granted

Until we meet again...

Only a leap from the lion's head...

I often get asked how I ended up working from home full time, so let's tell that story:

I had been with my employer for around 6 years and worked my way up to the highly sought-after management role that came with the even more coveted office. You know the one - The space with 4 real walls and a door that opens and closes. No longer in the open floor cube farm. I even had a window! Life was good.

My leader then changed to one with a more agile, modern view of the world, which led to the ability to periodically work from home. Those sporadic occasions turned into a committed one-day a week at home. And in preparation for a changing and more dynamic work space, that crept up to two days a week.

We had heard that our new work space would be "agile", meaning more flexible for the people working a few days at home. Less dedicated space, more collaboration space. Our little slice of the south was starting to sound more like Silicon Valley. Who wouldn't be excited?!

It was time to move, and our new digs weren't ready, and we were to be placed in temporary housing. The only problem was that due to its temp nature, there was very little space to go around (and it wasn't all that pretty either!) To condense space, some teams were asked if they would be willing to go all-in on being "agile" - meaning no dedicated desks, reduced footprint, and more time at home. Since this was going to be the wave of the future, and my team liked to think we were trendsetters, we volunteered.

Our temp space took us down to less than half of the desks we had before. And as for me, I lost my glorious office. So here we were, in a wicked game of musical chairs where the music had stopped and there weren't enough seats. We created a schedule for our little area documenting who was coming into the office on which days, because too many people would mean someone was sitting on the floor. We got the equipment set up at each cube so that no matter what type of machine you connected with, you'd be able to work from any of our desks. We created lockers for people to pack up all of their personal items at the end of the day. We basically created a hotel and reservation system.

The result was an increase in the number of days people were at home. But some other interesting ramifications sprouted up. People felt like they were homeless nomads. Whether at work or at home, each day you would have to pack up everything. You were never rooted. Especially in the office, where that wasn't "your" desk, and someone else would be there tomorrow. People wasted time setting up and tearing down each day to promote the clean desk guidelines in the office. And moreover, people weren't getting the benefit of being physically present in the work space because their coworkers weren't there when they were.

This led to the question: "If I never see the people I work with, what is the value of coming to the office?"

That was a pivotal point. I felt the same as my team. So we began to ask that question to leaders and let our feelings be known. With understanding and support from a great leader, we went off the grid. My team became unofficially full-time at-home workers. No one else knew about it. We were conducting an experiment. Could we keep our business partners satisfied with their service from home? Let's not tell them and find out...

Obviously we know how the story ends. Customers said they received better service. There was no negative reaction when people found out. And the rest is history. Four years of working from home later, and it still works.

So now you know. But so what? Why does my story matter? I took a leap of faith. My team was piloting that "agile" work space notion. The infrastructure wasn't ready. The culture wasn't ready. Many days were very tough emotionally and productivity-wise. Each day was a surprise battle waiting. Simply put, those initial "agile" weeks downright sucked.

We knew it wasn't ready and jumped in anyway. We struggled daily, but didn't give up. We took a leap of faith that, while we didn't see it then, a net would appear and catch us if we fell. "Only a leap from the lion's head will he prove his worth." For those that know this quote, you will also recall that after this leap of faith, waiting on the other end was the Holy Grail. And sure enough, so was ours.

I never thought that working in an "agile" environment would lead to being at home full time, and the movement that started thereafter. I never thought I'd become an evangelist for work-at-home or a guide to so many. I never thought that my life would have changed so much for the better. All because I took a deep breath and leapt.

Don't Fade Away

We've all had those work relationships where your coworkers become your best friends and family. Heck, you often see them more than your other friends and family! You talk everyday about what is going on in each other's lives, you eat lunch together, you celebrate life's big moments, you create inside jokes, and often you choose to hang out after hours as a result. These coworkers aren't just people you work with, they are your people. Or, so you think...

When you change jobs, do these relationships stick? Are they ever the same? Usually you exchange email addresses and may friend each other on Facebook and promise to stay in touch. You may even do so for a while. But there's something different. And, over time, that person who you considered near and dear is all but a memory. You didn't want to cut them out. You didn't actively do anything to "break up" with them. So what happened?

Most work relationships are formed out of convenience. Because you are sitting next to someone every day, it's easy to talk to them, see their photos, notice changes in their appearance, and share in casual downtime moments. You didn't have to work for it. And the minute you, or they, did - well, that's just too much effort! You transitioned from convenient to conscious.

This same thing happens to relationships when you move from an in-office worker to an at-home worker. (It's even harder when you never started in the office and are building off nothing!) Your relationship with your coworkers and even your leaders was often convenient. Staff meetings were in person. Lunches were physical gatherings. Pictures were real photos hanging on your cube wall. Hugs and handshakes were shared. Your relationship had tangible components within an arms reach and mindless recognition.

Now that you are at home, each of these interactions is harder. You may feel like you are losing touch, and the people you thought were your closest friends are now out of sight, out of mind. How do you keep your relationships from dwindling away and becoming just another memory? There are two primary components to keeping what you had (or starting something new): Convenience and Effort.

We have already established that many of these relationships formed out of convenience in the first place. It stands to reason that keeping them alive must also be convenient. It is important to create an environment where relationships are welcome and come naturally. Some ideas:

• Call instead of email. Your voice, tone, inflection, accent, etc. share information about you with others and establish a human connection.
• Use your video camera. Take it up a notch and add real video chat instead of just a phone call. Software and hardware that are easy to use and readily available are the keys to making this as natural as traditional face-to-face conversations.
• Allow time in your meetings for chatter. Start your meeting with casual conversation, catching up or getting to know those on the line. You already have people on the phone, which makes it truly convenient to interact and reestablish those relationships.
• Utilize social networking applications, and mobile ones where available. These are already second nature to most people, so using these tools is meeting people where they are already engaging.
• Employ other modern communication techniques such as instant message and text. These are quick and easy, and another solution already common practice in personal communications.

Let's face it. No matter how convenient you make it, there will still be effort involved. It's just not the same casual convenience you had before. Both parties must have a desire to keep (or build) the relationship. A fire will die out if not tended.

With a little bit of effort and convenient communal areas, you can keep your relationships just as strong as they were when you previously sat next to your coworker. You may even find that your relationship is deeper and more meaningful as a result of intentional interaction as opposed to convenient conversions.